Chrysalis Healing Collaborative

February 4, 2015 By Grant Ellis

Valentines Day Date (on a budget)

Valentines Day is fast approaching. If you are an old married couple or you are “Newly Dates” as my wife calls new couples, it is likely that you will be planning a wonderful special date night… (or better be if you are smart, Guys).

You don’t have to break the piggy bank or go deeper into debt by dropping $150 dollars on dinner and another $100 dollars on roses. We like the idea of creating a memorable evening by really giving the gift that every lover always needs more of, feeling cherished.

In his book The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman says there are basically five ways or languages that people show and feel love. The five love languages are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. You might feel most loved by a warm hug or a compliment (a Combo of Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation). This is a favorite way I express my love. You may have a partner that loves having long conversations and feeling heard and understood (Quality Time). Most of us can give and receive love in several ways. But for many, one primary “Love Language” speaks directly to our hearts. Little clues that tell our partners that they are special and we truly love being able to show them how cherished they are.

Some of the great ideas for a memorable and inexpensive Valentines Day I have found include things like:
• Cooking a meal together.
• Rent a movie or stream a favorite on line
• Go to a high-end restaurant for dessert only ( Ted Drewes opens soon )
• Go to a tourist spot in your hometown. (Here in Saint Louis there is The Arch, Take the free tour at Anheuser Busch, the refurbished Union Station Hotel lobby, etc.)
• Go to the Art Museum
• Show off your childhood haunts. Talk about your favorite memories growing up. (This is my favorite with my wife. I didn’t grow up in her neighborhood and I really feel closer to her when I see the places that were important to her and her family.)
• Go to a local park
• Take a nature walk with the dogs (weather permitting)
• Take a drive to a small town and have an inexpensive meal at a local Mom n Pop diner.
• Make a bucket list together and do something listed on there tonight.
• Read a Book aloud together
• See a free concert
• Game night at home

Some love languages can be worked into just about any of these dates. If your gal loves to receive compliments and praise, write out things you appreciate about her, and give them to her throughout your date. Or you could even put them on a sticky note on her steering wheel as a surprise throughout the week.  This may seem pretty basic, but the bottom line is that you don’t have to spend loads of money on a conventional dinner date for Valentine’s Day. If you really want a date night to remember, what you need is thoughtfulness. Start by understanding what makes your significant other feel cherished, and then work that into your affordable – but romantic – date night.

For more information on finding your partners’ Love Language, communicating on a deeper level, and seeking more ways to live, laugh and love together, give the Chrysalis Healing Collaborative a call at 314-395-8505 or email info@chcstl.org. You can set up a free 15 minute consult with one of our counselors today.  To contact Grant Ellis, LPC (the author of this blog) call 314-898-5538 or email Grant at https://www.serenitygranted.com/contact/.

Filed Under: couples Tagged With: couples, love, money

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